10 Things You Should Never Do on a First Date

First dates can be nerve-wracking, exciting, and full of potential—but they can also go downhill fast if you don’t handle them right. While there’s no perfect formula for a great first date, there are definitely a few major red flags that can ruin your chances of a second one. Here are 10 things you should never do on a first date if you want to make a great impression.

1. Show Up Late Without a Good Reason

Nothing sets a bad tone like being late with no explanation. It signals that you don’t value the other person’s time. According to Inc.com, punctuality is one of the strongest signals of respect and responsibility.

Fix it: If you’re running behind, send a quick message with an ETA. Better yet, plan to arrive 10 minutes early.

2. Talk About Your Ex

Bringing up an ex on a first date is the ultimate buzzkill. Whether it’s praise or bitterness, it’s a sign you’re not emotionally available—and no one wants to feel like a rebound.

Better move: Keep the conversation focused on your present and future, not the past.

3. Be Glued to Your Phone

Constantly checking your notifications makes your date feel like your second priority. According to Pew Research, 82% of people find phone use during meals annoying.

Fix it: Silence your phone and put it away. Show you’re truly present.

4. Overshare Personal Trauma

It’s great to be open, but a first date isn’t the time to dive into your childhood trauma or last breakup. Emotional depth comes later—oversharing too early can feel intense and overwhelming.

Tip: Save the heavy stuff for future dates when emotional trust has been established.

5. Get Wasted

Having a drink or two can ease nerves—but getting sloppy drunk? Not cute. It blurs boundaries, slurs communication, and often leads to regret. Healthline recommends keeping alcohol light or skipping it altogether to stay sharp and respectful.

Fix it: Know your limit—and stick to it.

6. Talk Only About Yourself

One-sided conversations are a huge turnoff. A Psychology Today article points out that people who dominate conversation often struggle with self-awareness.

Pro tip: Practice active listening. Make it a two-way street with open-ended questions.

7. Be Rude to Service Staff

How you treat the people around you—especially those in customer service—speaks volumes. Being short, dismissive, or condescending is a red flag.

Remember: Kindness is attractive. Harvard Business Review emphasizes that basic decency reflects emotional maturity.

8. Talk About Marriage or Kids Right Away

Yes, you might be dating for long-term potential—but talking about baby names before dessert is a fast way to scare someone off.

Better approach: Focus on getting to know them. Save future-planning convos for when you’ve built a connection.

9. Try Too Hard to Impress

There’s a difference between confidence and putting on a show. Bragging, name-dropping, or flexing your achievements can come off as insecure.

Fix it: Be authentic. Let your actions and personality do the impressing.

10. Ignore Boundaries or Signals

If your date seems uncomfortable with a topic, don’t push it. If they’re not reciprocating physical touch or flirtation, back off. Consent and comfort are everything.

Golden rule: Read the room. If in doubt, ask respectfully or pivot the conversation.

Final Thoughts

First dates are about chemistry, connection, and mutual respect—not perfection. Avoiding these 10 missteps can help you stay present, confident, and most importantly, likable. Focus on making the other person feel comfortable, seen, and appreciated—and your odds of a second date will rise exponentially.